Reading Body Language in
Depth
By
Robert
Torrey
Body Language can tell you a lot about
what is happening in a relationship in so many ways. Is somebody feeling
distant, having second thoughts, or are they going to go home rip off all
your clothes and make wild, passionate love to you as soon as you close the
front door.
The clues are in the body language of
your partner.
Walking:
Lets take just walking to a destination
for an example.
Things that say you are in sync are great.
You are walking in about the same pace, side by side. Holding hands is another
positive. If you go to look at your partner and admire them they should
automatically return the admiration. There is a process known as mirroring
in psychology and NLP which stands for Neuro-Linguistic Programming. NLP
goes as far to say you should copy the persons mannerisms, body language
to get more in rapport with a person. This shouldnt be necessary as
if you are connecting well you and your partner should be in sync already.
There have even been studies that say heart rates get similar.
Warning signs for walking exists when
couples arent in rapport. If somebody walks far ahead or behind they
both have meanings. Far ahead would mean they just wish to lead, and get
away from their partner. Somebody who walks far behind could be scared of
their partner, and feel intimidated by them.
If your partner crosses the street and
gives absolutely no verbal or non verbal signals it is also a negative
sign.
Sitting:
Now sitting is another example that can
be used. Look at a pair of newlyweds. Youll see a lot of times they
sit next to each other in booths at a restaurant not across from one another.
They tend to remain close to each other no matter what. A family with a close
mother and father do the same thing even when kids are involved. A partner
Im dating might even sit sideways facing me in a car when they are
really into me.
Couples with good body language will
take the time to connect all the time. The will face towards one another
and when distractions stop will reengage each other in connecting. This can
be done with kissing, holding hands, eye contact, or conversation. Their
bodies should be angled towards each other and physical contact is done quite
often. Another sign in a restaurant is both of the couples are eating in
proportion to each other.
Negative signs are when somebody
doesnt connect during breaks. They instead read a menu again, look
out the window, play with their purse or engage everybody but the person
they are will. Their bodies are probably angled away from each other and
physical contact in minimal. If somebody is eating a lot of their meal and
the other is hardly touching their plate something is going on. The person
hardly touching their plate is probably bothered by something.
Making Love:
When a couple is in sync they connect
on a much deeper level they just physical. There should be a strong mental
aspect. Eye contact is one of the biggest things both partners should be
able to freely look into each others eyes during sex. Touching, holding,
kissing is usually all a natural occurrence that happens during love making.
A clasp of the hands with your partners, eye contact and others signal a
much deeper connection. Partners should be willing to give pleasure as well
as receive pleasure.
Some warning signs could be closed eyes
, in a stiffness in the shoulders and neck. These signal coldness,
anxiety
Be aware of the nonverbal communicate
you have with your mate. There was a research study done by a psychologist
known as Albert Mehrabian. His findings were its not what you say but
how you say it that really matters. Verbal communication only accounts for
7% of the total communication we communicate.
Robert Torrey
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